I remember myself wearing a Lab coat in chemistry lab, during my school days and experimenting with Kipp’s waste feeling elated, with dream of becoming a doctor some day, well I lacked ambition those days ( sorry, but it is my way of perceiving things), Somehow I landed somewhere else and became a writer both by choice and chance, but this story is not about me and my dreams, it is about a lady doctor, a doctor whose heart wrenching story would leave you drenched in tears by the time you read this whole story! It is a proud moment for all students especially their parents if they turn out to be child prodigy and be a member of this elite cream of the society. Same was in the case of Nusrat (Name changed), she was the only child of her parents and exceptional at studies as well. She, with her swot and sweat made it to the list of successful candidates who qualified MBBS! It was a gala day for her family and they thanked the Almighty for her remarkable success. She also received a gold medal for being a topper throughout the course. She started practicing and opened a clinic of her own. Years passed and many prospective suitors asked for marriage, finally her parents got her hitched to a guy from the same profession, who was an oncologist.
The problem with the guy namely Sabeer was that we was too conservative, money minded, orthodox and regressive at the same time. After their marriage, he put forward a long list of demands to be fulfilled including Nusrat leaving her job. Nusrat could not bring herself to fulfill all the nonchalant demands, but then she was a mature lady and had to surrender to these demands. Sabeer grew irritable day by day and used to take out sheer frustration of his work on Nusrat. Nusrat, once a strong, independent and career oriented woman had to oblige as she was mother of two sons, she did not want that the black shades of their marriage should not fall on her sons!
She left her job and used to Baby Sit the kids, in the mean time, her parents started showing resentment towards this decision of saber, but the outcome was even worse, he gaged her phone and strictly forbade her to talk any of her relatives, especially her parents! This was something totally unacceptable! Nusrat now blaming the shady fortune of hers suffers from several disorders and Sabeer is too busy in making a living, that he does not pay any heed to her.
Now, after hearing this story, was confidence was in tatters! A girl will always be a girl, an object of tolerance and patience, that is it. Now this is a scenario seen mostly in Kashmir these days, Men want to marry highly qualified ladies and then make them sit at homes. If you are so religious and do not want anyone to have a look at your wives, then what is the point of marrying career oriented women? You can undoubtedly choose domestic ladies who will convert your homes to heavens? What is the point in searching for doctorates and officers when you only want your wives to be your slaves? Stop being so orthodox and callous and give your wives equal rights! And you have no right to shun her freedom of talking to her parents, you are not her owner, just remember that! Pathetic !!
|Azra Mufti is a freelance columnist and writes columns for newspapers like rising kashmir, kashmir times and kashmir observer. currently pursuing MBA in one of the leading institutes in chandigarh.|
Religious bigotry will not die in Kashmir. This has come to stay there. The problem is mindset developed with young people through the constant hammering of their minds by narrow minded people surrounding them. This a sad situation which will remain all the time with unfortunate people living in Kashmir.
Added By hirdy nehru
One should remember that it is the man's world and a woman has always to suffer the atrocities of man as a daughter, as a wife and as a widow by her son. She is to behave like a pressure cooker and keep her feelings, emotions and hopes hidden and be a part of culture of silence. It is unfortunate that many times women are more often than not victim of schemes of their own race in the form of mother outlaws, sister outlaws, etc..
Added By hirday pandit